When childhood illness strikes someone we know, it tugs on our heartstrings. We want to help, but what can we do? As a mother who has endured an extended hospital stay with her newborn son and a few unexpected medical crises thereafter, and as the founder of a nonprofit that ministers to families navigating medical crises, I’d like to share 10 practical ways you can help a family when a child is seriously ill.
Oftentimes, when a child is seriously ill, parents find themselves spending a lot of time in the hospital. If the illness came as a surprise, parents may not have essentials like toiletries, a change of clothes, or chargers for their devices. A bag of essential items (new or used) can save parents stress and money.
Any glamour associated with “eating out” in a hospital cafeteria wears off quickly as it inevitably sucks your wallet dry. Ordering a meal through a delivery service, organizing a meal train, or providing restaurant gift cards can be a great way to lessen the burden on families.
For those families driving back and forth to be with their child, the gas tank shows no mercy. Gas cards are a practical way to offset the financial impact of an already difficult situation.
When your child is sick, the world doesn’t stop. Household chores and maintenance still need to get done. Taking out trash, mowing the lawn, and collecting mail are all things that can be done (sometimes even without asking) and can be one less thing families have to worry about.
Having a seriously ill child takes a lot of emotional bandwidth. One meaningful way that you can help a family is by stepping in to care for their other children and provide an opportunity for parents to rest and recharge. Taking children to a park, visiting with a movie and snacks, or offering to include them in your carpool are all ways that you can increase a family’s emotional bandwidth as you lighten their load and pour into their children.
Another way to emotionally support a family is to offer to be their communications director. I know the title might sound funny, but often in the middle of a medical crisis families are bombarded with well-meaning texts and phone calls. To be on the receiving end of each message, and the unwritten obligation to respond with the ever-changing updates, can be overwhelming. Having one person who serves as the contact person or communications director can be a blessing to a family navigating a medical crisis. (Picture those phone trees that existed before cell phones and the invention of group texts.) If you are extroverted, this could be a great way to optimize your social nature for the good of others.
A medical crisis can be paralyzing; even the most seasoned Christians can find themselves frozen. Days blur together and mental capacity lacks. If you have the gift of encouragement, this could be a wonderful way to support a family whose child is seriously ill. Send them sermons that might minister to them, songs that might encourage or comfort, and prayers that might give words to their feelings. Pour into them without expecting a response.
Another way you can spiritually support a family is to request free tangible, faith-based resources on their behalf. Praying Through ministries is a global nonprofit that currently sends such support to men, women, and children in the USA (they do have some resources available to families outside the USA). In a time when you may wish to really support a family spiritually but may not feel equipped to do so yourself, calling on an organization that specializes in this can be a real blessing.
In His Hands by Jessika Sanders and Eric M. Schumacher is a book of prayers written to offer help and support when your child or unborn baby is seriously ill and you don't know what to pray.