The Art of Disagreeing

Philip G. Ryken

Culture wars, political polarization, and the toxic climate of social media are making it harder than ever for Christians to have conflictual conversations that build up relationships rather than tearing them down. Gavin Ortlund rightly believes that it is possible for us to disagree without being disagreeable. In The Art of Disagreement—a book blessedly short enough to read before your next hard conversation—Ortlund offers both spiritual encouragement and practical guidance for listening well, speaking wisely, and honoring God whenever we disagree.

Andrew Wilson

Gavin is one of the best models of thoughtful, gracious, and healthy disagreement that I know. In this timely book, he shows us how we can learn from, listen to, persuade, and love one another, with a warmth and wisdom that we can all learn from.

“Dealing with Disagreement”

When I first started working for the church, I think I had a very shiny view of what it would be like! In my head, we would always be very friendly, never disagreeing and being able to decide things together quite easily. Now having worked in the church for a decade, it's not that simple! People can love one another and follow Jesus together, but still disagree. However, what matters is working out how we disagree well, being faithful in our work and building one another up in our conversations, even when we need to disagree. This short book from Gavin Ortlund is a good starting point to help us work out how we might be kind, courageous, persuasive, loving, and listen well, even when we need to have those hard conversations

“Concise and Clear!”

In 5 short chapters, Gavin Ortlund gives believers a model for handling disagreements in a way that is reflected in Scripture and brings glory to Christ. Instead of overemphasizing tolerance or championing brashness, Ortlund encouraged us to embrace both kindness AND courage as he shows why each is necessary for positive conversations. Using biblical passages, examples seen in arts and culture, and references to philosophy, he walks readers through what it looks like to listen well, speak persuasively, and overall LOVE the other.

This concise and accessible book is written directly to Believers as it compels us to handle the various conflict-prone situations in our lives in a way that reflects Jesus. I read this independently, but I think it would be especially beneficial for growth in a small group setting. The included discussion questions after each chapter lend themselves well to group conversations.

“Practical and encouraging!”

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and was grateful for it's compact length! Gavin is concise and practical in everything he shares with a well-rounded viewpoint that understands the complexities of disagreements. I'm already putting these skills into practice and am keeping the book handy on my shelf for when I need a refresher! Highly recommend.

“Handling disagreements with wisdom and grace!”

In a world where people are quick to argue and slow to listen, this book is a much-needed reminder that how we handle disagreements matters. Gavin Ortlund points us to humility, wisdom, and biblical kindness—challenging us to disagree in a way that honors Christ.